Rules are meant to be learned, followed, obeyed—and broken? YES—once you have thoroughly learned those rules. Settle in for a rousing discussion-focused workshop on the tenets of negotiation and limit setting; defining irresponsibility; and how and when to work through fear to express vulnerability. Examine the parameters of “safe”—as well as how thin and versatile those parameters can be. You’ve done the 101. And another 101. You’ve played. You’ve had dynamics. You’ve grown. Now, come talk about how, when, where, and if to break the rules. This class can be taught by Sera and/or Frida, solo or together.
Since the 1990s, Frida Miles has amused audiences at conferences and play parties. For over fifteen years, Frida was part of the sex industry, and become an authority in the art of seduction for profit. In the early 2000s, Frida joined the NM Fetish community and has since presented for local, regional, and national conferences addressing issues of gender, sex, sexuality, class, body autonomy, and race.
Fisting (Frontal and Posterior)
Frida Miles will detail the steps needed to achieve successful frontal and posterior fisting as well as the physical and emotional preparation needed from all participants. She will go over materials, anatomy, and risks involved in fisting and discuss the differences in pleasure relevant to anatomy. This workshop will also address the unique qualities and needs of those within the FTM community when it comes to fisting, whether those needs and qualities are due to the changes that genitalia undertakes as a result of hormonal therapy or simply due to the fascinating complexity of sexual interaction with people of gender variant identities. This workshop will provide you with tools and anatomical knowledge that will hopefully aid you in your dynamics.
*This workshop can be adapted to cover only cis-gendered vaginal fisting; anal fisting; and/or fisting for FTMs. Sera Miles, if attending, will demo bottom and assist instructor.
How to Breakup with the Individual(s) and Not the Community: an Ethical Guide to Surviving a Breakup within Alternative Communities
Break-ups within alternative communities are particularly hard. We find ourselves sequestered in a fictitious microcosms that makes our dynamics feel somewhat incestuous. We find ourselves dependant on members of such communities to the point of creating family-like ties. We attempt to exercise ownership of both individuals and groups. Without a flexible and compassionate approach this situation can lead to unnecessary and destructive conflict during and after a break-up. A positive outcome depends on the skillful and egalitarian orchestration of the steps that can be taken during and after the break-up. Frida will share their break-up experiences and walk you through the do and don’ts they learned first-hand. This workshop is not designed to be a form of individual or group therapy. While this will be a safe and welcoming space the nature of the workshop could be troublesome for some people. Please be aware of your stimuli and triggers.
PERV, Providing Education with Respect and Vision
Join us for an invigorating class on vocabulary, common sense (that isn’t so common!), etiquette, expectations, and safety. New to the kink/Leather/BDSM/fetish community? This class is for you! Been around for awhile? Come for a refresher! This class can be taught by Sera and/or Frida, solo or together.
Playing with Gender Variant People (guided discussion)
What do you want me to call you? You will be wearing a what? How do I address your genitalia? These are a few of the questions that come up when we play with people who are gender variant. There is no universal formula to follow and every dynamic is magically unique, but it always helps to discuss among those who share your experiences. This facilitated discussion will include a group exercise that helps us more deeply imagine how to prepare for playing and successfully engaging with gender variant people within our community.
Privilege and its Influence in the Kink Communities
Within Kink there is the assumption that due to our preferences a certain level of subversiveness and enlightenment is innately part of our consciousness. But the reality is that all of us are influenced by social norms and behavioral expectations that began at birth and continue throughout our lives. Obedience and subscription to such norms and expectations grant and or deny individuals access to privilege. Privilege is defined as special rights, advantages, or immunities granted or made available only to a particular person or group of people. This workshop will address the influence that privilege plays in the Kink communities and the roles that we as members perform in the perpetuation of system of oppression. As most workshops that address issues of race, class and gender this workshop could potentially be triggering for some individuals. It can enhance already present emotions and or reactions; therefore please be aware of your needs.
The More You Give, the More You Get: Polyamory 101
Learn about the dynamics of polyamory from someone who lives and celebrates a life of many loves. Examine the joys and pitfalls of loving more than one person; common misconceptions about polyamory; and the potential dynamics of living polyamory. This workshop will discuss polyamory as an orientation and moreover give attendees tools for creating positive polyamorist relationships. This class can be taught by Sera and/or Frida, solo or together.
We All Love a Redemption Story. Do We?
Mistakes are made, people get hurt, people go on sabbatical to heal, and/or people are asked to leave the community. What happens when people come back? In this workshop we will discuss the role that we play in the hospitable or hostile re-introduction of those who have been asked or have chosen to leave the community. We will analyze the differences between attempting to solve a problem and perpetuating the situation, as well as the differences between policing and supporting the community. Finally we will address the reason(s) behind our involvement. Feel free to bring questions but keep in mind that this workshop is not intended to be accusatory nor therapeutic.